Dispatch from the Land of the Weary

Have just returned from spending 6-plus hours in car STOP Whoah STOP Must unpack back seat's accumulated mass of air-dropped relief in the form of toys, cheerios, and other objects intended to amuse child STOP Must eat something other than chocolate covered pretzels, chips, gum, and Diet Coke STOP Broccoli STOP Maybe McDonald's STOP Must praise child for being excellent at solitary confinement STOP It is great to be home STOP Can't remember if there are clean sheets on the bed STOP Will sleep on no sheets, dirty sheets, or cement slab STOP Whichever requires me to walk the shortest distance STOP before STOP I STOP pass STOP out STOP STOP STOP